Who else is waiting on news? I find when I am waiting I have wild swings between hope and hopelessness, between expectation and self-protection. It’s not easy to maintain a sense of detachment from the possibilities, is it? I am a dreamer and there is a part of me that wants to let my hope fly free, unclipped by the realities of the publishing industry. And then there is the other more practical, realistic part of me that knows there are some things you just can’t control.
For me, though, hope always wins out. It means that in the end I’m sometimes even more disappointed than I would have been if I hadn’t allowed myself to hope, but I think it’s better for my creativity. I don’t think my muse has a realistic bone in her body and she doesn’t like it much when I try to talk sense into her or try to reason with her about the truths of publishing. When I do, she just shuts up for a while. So, that leaves me vulnerable to disappointment. Can there be any other way?
Hope refuses to perch
as if she had arrived for only a visit,
like so many flitting wings
on the branches of a bloodwood tree,
weaving instead feathers from her breast
into the fabric of my soul.
Her fussing brings pain,
reminding me of a presence I’ve tried
to ignore, preferring instead
a familiar landscape of barren desert,
averting my eyes from the want within,
to grow as if shielded from sun, protected
from possibilities until they would
weigh my branches with promise.
But hope, feathered hope, is already here,
nestled so sweetly for laying,
and I await with the pain
14 thoughts on “Wednesday in the Waiting Room — National Poetry Month”
Wowie wow wow.
This is one of the best pieces I’ve read anywhere in a long time.
Is it on your site?
I just love it.
You know my fingers are crossed for you.
And look at your cutie pie new picture! You’re gorgeous.
You’re a goofball. 🙂 I actually just got my haircut yesterday because in that pic, you can’t see it but my hair was sort of like a mullet. And I had to let it grow out forever and it’s still not really fixed yet. But maybe by next time!
Nope, not on my site. I might have posted it here on my blog a long time ago, I can’t remember. How goes the revision for the requestage?
Great! I love how it’s turning out! I just hope I’m not the only one. I think I’m almost there.
Your hair looks cute, not mullet-y at all. P:)
My feelings exactly. Thanks for putting it in such great words.
Hope is a tricky thing to put into words. 🙂
You amaze me.
Oh, no. You’d be utterly bored by me in real life, I imagine. 🙂 But I’m willing to risk it. I hope we do get to meet in person sometime!
At least we’re in good company in the waiting room.
I’m going to spend some of this waiting time partaking in a much-needed overhaul. Can you say haircut and pedicure??? 🙂
Haircut, check. Done yesterday. Pedicure? In desperate need.
Beautiful poem. Thanks so much for sharing it!
Thank you for liking it!
Love the Dickinsonian touch here, Kristy.
And I hear you on the muse. I don’t think mine has any actual bones in her body, not to mention realistic ones. She’s floatier than all that. As it should be. Crossing fingers for you…